Born in a small beautiful town among a very romantic family -smart mom and funny dad, and an older brother who would sacrifice his life to protect me from the world's cruelty.
Get anything that I want from my dad, even the silliest one. Have a very attentive mom that I even tell her the most unimportant problem of mine. Make it to be the number 1 in school, also with a very supportive and care friends.
Date a nice and hillarious and very smart guy in town who will sing me a song with a guitar in his hand, and a cute smile on his face. We are dating like several years but everyday feels like the first day we meet each other. There is always something new to do, to talk, to laugh at. I love him.
Get into a very famous university abroad with a scholarship. Hardship will never lie.
Being proposed by my first love in a beyond romantic way, Oh God what else do I want in this world.
Being married to a guy that has been in my dream for couple of years. My soulmate. Our honeymoon is called "kissing around the world".
Give birth to a very cute tiny girl, named Mikhaila. She is going to be smart and beautiful.
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It seems like a very perfect story, doesnt it? Of course that is not real. No one in this world would be able to have that kind of dreamed life.
The world is so full of surprise. Some might be happiness, some might be trouble.
The interesting part about it is that you dont know which part you get into the next second. The best thing you can do is just enjoying the present as much as possible as well as pursuing whatever you want in your point of view about happiness.
How about me? I'm not much of a dreamer, actually.
I have been through a lot in my life. I mean, a lot. There are several occurence that actually build this very skeptikal trait of mine. For whatever it is, I am now a very skeptikal person. I believe in happiness, i do. But I dont expect much from it.
I dont really believe in faith. Not that I step over God's will, I'm just pretty sure that whatever happen in your life now, there is always something to do with your past. It is something in your past that creates the "now". It is either yourself a month ago, 3 years ago, or even your mom or dad 20 years ago. They all took an important role on how your character were build, on how big your problem is, or on how much in a happiness you are.
And now that im thinking about it, I would say that I dont want to have a bad future just because I cant manage to have some good effort in the present.
But, who am I to decide it all? God creates another person for a reason.
They, people, are one of the externalities that would potentially change my projected future. No matter how I perfectly picture it in my head, other people will always there to drive it different route. And what's in for me?
Nothing. I should be the master of my own future. That is what I should say to myself, right?
But here I am. Writing in the middle of the night, with a very random thoughts about future and every possibilities that could potentially destroy it. Or beautify it.
It is of course, non sense at all.
Now i'm getting sillier. I guess I should end this post. I actually think about something that practically dont need to be thought of.
I guess I just have to enjoy life more. For whatever it hides, I will try my best to live present as much as I hope it would lead to a better future of mine.
At least much much better than the past that I had. Amin :)
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